So, the kairos.
More than any mere 'sin'.
My favourite winter day of the year.
Even if I a sunshine addict.
Awake as always, these 25 years at very early.
I mean that is the thing: the lack of any deeper lexicon or fable is the
true death of the mind in that those little chummy phrases like ‘silver
lining’ which one worries anyone under about fifty seems now to be only able to
communicate in, are nothing.
Without a tale. And it may take decades to condense the tales into some
user friendly low attention span few paragraphs, so that...
But hark... the chubby one yesterday as i was telling her about Stevie...
At last ‘ hope’...
We will have to come back to her.
Anyway the big word is ‘license’ but i shall have to come back to that.
But going there last night, that wasn’t in the plan.
But least i sound like a fruitbat flying through the woods munching nutjobs...
Twenty five years ago as a single parent, requiring the internet of lies
and deceit to work....a bit...
Living in the wilds, the signal always so dam slow.
The ‘silver lining’ – but then to see the fruits in the flickering
sunrays of it, one has to wait, several decades perhaps, even...
So as to actually use the aforementioned web, then, to then feed my
hungry offspring dad would have to be up often at 4am days on end selling his
ten thousand books online...GOOD ones...
a proper ‘curated’ collection.
Forget that as the spiritual sloth of this land we knew about then,
except when one for years has to (oh woe is me) awake at 4 or 5 because after 7
or 8 the web would slow so, twas unusable...
And that became more than ‘habit’ but, a way of life....
I do so adore this day when my 5am is their 6am and its still so
gorgeous quiet but just for a few weeks maybe a few of them have adjusted to my
time zone...a bit
But the silver lining one realises over the years is fart far more than
just a glimpse at what is good, because when ones whole day is adjusted to
being productive from very early.... (by yourn clock) and almost always unless some monsoon one is out
in the UV and IR by ten latest...
You don’t have to bother any more with these rather tired words ‘mental
health’ as ...
There is little question about it they are largely the words of a mal
adjusted society.....cos awake and be in the light, from when it gets light
You are bulletproof.
Spesh if you’ve had always 8 hrs shut eye...in that dark.
And espesh... to walk past her’n and see her ghostly stood there i thought she was dead...
The way we never see her... whilst i have my elevenses.
But hark,
what with seeing her again after these four years, and
seeing her again last night after twenty, and ....
well
t'was thirty ago that she ... by having her bun in the oven adjusted my DNA
such that i could never be that 'me' again, and then 2020 i discover i was
right
That even
with dozens of new birds to chase around the byways on my old bike...
In that
most glorious 100 days of forever sunshine that began mid March 20920....
Nevertheless,
it started with Matilda...age 10
and ended
but began with that N1 ...age 11...
And we
... [we he says i know it was only me, as does little Miss Non Byronic...]
even ended up with an N2...
Some
names must be changed to protect the innocent...
Which
does not include little Miss Non Byronic sister as we know...
But then
shee'n married to Godzilla so she can make any sauciest joke in the wold
that winter, she wants, stood next to me randy as hell as....she knows, and us
alone walking them ‘ills together ... putting right the meaning of life and
ills of the pathetic society she hookers herself tryin to fix... the wrong
way...as she knows.
And now i
know.
No, she
wouldn't even mind if some fuckwit who hasnt eaten enough fruibats or nutjobs
for her'n head to work right, or got enough sleepo, told her..." you know
he riffed that year upon you as his NB sis.."?
Because
of course with a name like hers. well... She must have a whole ferkin Odd
Essay celebrating what.... next.
She
started!
Now, one
thing i will not have, being the chattering snotteratti class seem to have
ramped up their rewriting of history, is anyone else claim to have been as
happy i was as of April 2020...
And mine
proof - well i have a LOT, but for now, i never waste money on an URL unless ‘it’
really is somehow working, and important...
and then
we had poignant2021 - with no moaning, poignant doesnt mean fucking moan it
means you see the woman you have truly valued for 5 years from afar having
spent a day with her 5 years ago.... "at last a human !!! rahh rahh... she
writes on her wall the word 'poignant'...at last someone whom can use and relish
words rather than fuckwit memes of masks burnin... "
But if it
were not for her coming back in the warm dark...not disturbing
me too much...
I
wouldn't really be at ultra kairos time
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